2014 and the past,

Fuhh fuhhh. *habuk* Hahaha okay. Hi everyone!

Soo today is 30th of December 2014, well that means that we're almost there, till the end of the year. So yah, i guess you know what am I gonna write about. Of course about the new year and the years before.

You know, I always having problem with moving on. If something happens, I'll be stuck with the past for such a long time. It's sucks. Okay, so I think I wanna let go of this thing that I've been hold on since 4 years ago. You know, people always talk about ending the year and starting the new year with different people. Well I lost my very precious people in my life about 4 years ago.

Those who grew up with me know me, the real me. Who I am. And i was totally different back then. And I am so thankful for having them by my side. They'll always be there no  matter what. Even at my worst. I always wanna go back to school because the life was so much easier than now. I had my friends, true friends back then who willing to help without expecting anything back. I really don't know or I'm still figuring it out like what exactly happened until we're now no longer talking to each other.

I mean I don't know, we all just stop talking after school ended. And most them further studies overseas so we just stop talking. Not really suddenly stop talking, not without having major dramas of my life. So yah, I'm avoiding any dramas right now, in my life. And plus, what I've learned now, people can be two-faced or even infinity-faced. So no, thank you, I'm just too tired dealing with people. So I'm pretty much sure that I don't care about what drama you wanna create just don't mess with my life. Try someone else's. Okay?

So I started my diploma with my very own built high walls and I'm having problem with getting closer to people than they are right now. I'm okay with these best friends I still have in my life. We don't really contact with each other, we're just met or having our small reunion like after 4-10 years. And you guys know who you are. Thank you for still be there.

So to those who left, I am thankful for what we had been through, and thank you for everything, every tears of mine that you guys had to deal with, thank you for listening to my problems, thank you for sorting out my life, thank you for being my friends or best friends and just live your lives to the fullest because I'm pretty sure you guys are having the best of your lives right now, and just be happy and may you guys be successful in no matter what you're doing.

And to those who stay, thank you for staying and let's meet up sometime even we're having hard time to see each other because of different schedules and in different countries and region or states. May you guys will always be happy and take care of yourselves aight! And to new friends, hi! I don't know what else to write.

And here to new year and me not holding on to the past no more. I am now officially letting go of what had happened! Yeaymee, like finally -_-

Presents

Hello it's me!
Okay I know I said that I'm gonna delete the blog but maybe later. Hahaha. Okay so today I cleaned up the room because I'm gonna move in to the other room which is my very own room, which bring me to the part where I can decorate my own room without have to ask my sister can we do this and that. Hahahaha okay. So yah, while went through my stuff, I found few boxes which I keep until now because it's the presents from Zafri. Hehe.

So yah, my very first birthday that we celebrated together was back to 2010. He came to my house in the middle of the night, which he planned it with my brother. I really was surprised. He gave me a handbag that I keep in the other bag because it's been so long so it's kinda break apart. But I didn't throw it away because I don't want to even it's not in a good condition.

And then he gave me a perfume for our one year anniversary, which he left it in my bag because he had to go back to penang. And guess what I really found it on the right day and not realized it was there. The perfume, that I still keep until now because my kind of bad habit is, I don't use up all the perfume till it finishes. I'll leave it like 2 ml and keep the bottle up till now.

Next, he bought me a phone for my next birthday.



Yupp this one. I still have the phone even it's broken, kind of broken. But I still keep it. And the box too!

Next, we both paid to buy this.



Because it was a thing at that moment. So yah it's ours!

And this one, was the present he gave me back to 2011. I still love it and still use it.



I mean there's more but this gonna be a hell long post then. Haha. This bring me to a part where those girls who wish their boyfriend or whoever special in their life to buy expensive stuff for them, and even some said "every guy should learn so much from him". I know it makes you happy, it makes me happy to receive these kind of presents, but you can't make them to buy those stuff for you, it's up to them. Because we all have been through ups and downs which we don't really afford to buy expensive stuff to make you happy. But with even the smallest thing like belanja makan pun is enough. You should be happy to have them in your life and not because they give you things. You know what I mean right? I mean it's kind of advantage to receive presents etc but ig we stop receiving stuff from them, don't be like "why?!". Just be happy they're now yours. That would be enough. Okay?

Byeeee

The endddd

Fuhh fuhh. Haha berhabuk. I've been so busy, I don't even have time to catch up the new movies for weeks dah ni haih. Oh Ohhh yes, will not be using this blog anymore. Bye bye bye. I guna tumblr saja lepas ni ye youu alls. Sambil cuci mata, sambil post blog. Hahaha okay chowww!

Turn the page,

I couldnt deny the sadness, disappointment of everything had happened before. It keeps coming back. I thought I'm over it. But even the smallest thing remind me of how people are able to do anything to get what they want despite of any resistances. Looking back on how things crumbled and how this particular person walk away as if nothing happens. It hurts so bad. Its like you dont know the whole thing and you keep rewinding the event and you making up stories in your head to fill in the blank which they insisted not to let you know. And you keep on asking why and what is actually going on. As for me, knowing everything and hurt so bad is better than left with nothing. Because you cant move on until you know why, and whats the reason of all the actions taken.

I need to be able to control my emotion, my own life because letting others doing this, all this to me is driving me crazy. They had fun together and left me with madness. But i believe, Allah itu maha adil, and what goes around, comes around. So let just wait and see. Its not karma, but we know even in Islam, evertyhing you do has the consequences. May happiness will always be with you.

Current life

My Current Life

1. What was the highlight of your week?
Nothing like yah, nothing is special.

2. Whose car were you in last?
zafri's

3. When is the next time you will kiss someone?
Well, let's see

4. What color shirt are you wearing?
Baby blue

5. How long is your hair?
Shoulder length.

6. Are you good looking?
Hahaha no

7. Last movie you watched?
Kristy

8. Who were you with?
Zafri

9. Last thing you ate?
Nasi goreng

10. Last thing you drank?
Plain water

11. When was the last time you had your heart broken?
Can't recall hahahahaha kill me heh

12. Who came over last?
Zafri

13. Are you happy right now?
A big yes

14. What did you say last?
"tidur la"

15. Where is your phone?
Right in my hand

16. What color are your eyes?
Brownish

17. Are you left-handed?
Nopeee

18. Spell your name without vowels:
ST NR QL RZL

19. Do you have any pets?
5 cats

20. Favorite Vacation?
All of it

21. What do you dislike currently?
Nothing I guess

22. What are you listening to?
Better than revenge by Taylor Swift

23. If you could have one thing right now what would it be?
I'm not sure whether the gold watch or Nike sports shoes

24. What is your favorite scent?
Lemon. Yes.

25. Who makes you happiest?
Family friends and Zafri hiks

26. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Sleeping?

27. When is your birthday?
22nd of march

28. Who has the same phone as you?
No one that I know

29. Last time you went swimming in a pool?
After I finished my diploma

30. Do you read your horoscope?
Used to

31. Where was the last place you bought something?
Wait i can't remember what was the last thing I bought?

32. How do you feel about your hair right now?
Loving it

33. Do you bite your nails?
Nopeee

34. Do you have any expensive jewelery?
Not that expensive. But yah pretty much

35. Do you wear any jewelery?
Bracelets

36. Myspace or facebook?
Neither

37. How fast have you driven a car?
Hahahaha since I don't have my driving license yet, so the answer is not so fast. Don't wanna cause any trouble

38. Have you ever smoked?
I tried once because I just wanna know the taste of the cigarette. Hahahaha

39. What was or is your favorite subject in school?
Well out of 10 subjects, i like engineering drawing the most. Hahaha bio? The least favourite.

40. Do you have Verizon?
Nopeeee

41. What type of boy or girl do you usually fall for?
Tall dark and handsome = zafri

42. Do you have any hidden talents?
Try me

43. Favorite Song?
None

44. Do you like to sing at all?
Not really

45. Dream Job?
Something adventurous and not in the office of course.

46. Where does most of your family live?
Shah alam

47. Are you an only child or do you have siblings?
I have 2 sisters and a brother

48. Would you consider yourself to be spoiled?
Nope because my little sister kinda took all the attention away from me

49. What was the first thing you thought when you woke up?
Where's my phone

50. Do you drink?
Plain water? Yes

51. Know any other languages?
Bahasa and English. Yah

52. Ever write a coded message?
Haha no

53. Have you ever been IN a wedding?
I'm single and not married yet.

54. Do you have any children?
Hahahaha noo

55. Did you take a nap today?
Nope, I've been so busy

56. Who has the same birthday as you?
A long lost friend of mine. Met her like few years back then through her boyfriend but now I don't even remember her name...

57. Ever met anyone famous before?
Yes, like so many times

58. Do you want to be famous one day?
Nah

59. Any Pet Peeves?
No

60. Are you multitasking right now?
Am not

61. Do you like Britney Spears?
Okay je

62. What is your least favorite chore?
I don't know

63. Last place you drove your car?
Well not my car, the last time I drove which I'm not sure from where to where. Sec9 to home I guess. Or sec 7? Hahaha I don't remember.

64. Ever been out of the country?
Yes

65. Where were you born?
Malaysia hahaha

66. Could you handle being in the military?
I am not really sure but used to be active in marching activities and jungle tracking camping and stuff

67. What is your average cell phone bill?
Rm100

68. Who are you thinking about right now?
Tbh, Zafri lolololol

69. When was the last time you laughed REALLY hard?
Err can't recall

70. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
More than 10 for sure

71. Are your toes always painted?
No

72. How many piercings do you have?
A pair. Thinking of getting 2 more. Hahahahah

73. What are you doing today?
Study for the test tomorrow and zafri's friends sister wedding.

74. Have you ever been gambling?
Nope

75. When is the last time you updated your page?
Tah laaa

76. Do you like rollercoasters?
Hell yes.

77. Have you ever been to disneyland or world?
One day!

78. Do you have a favorite cartoon character?
Pooh.

79. Last thing you cooked?
Mee goreng for breakfast!

80. How's the weather?
Raining heavily

81. Do you e-mail?
Yupp,

82. What's the stupidest thing you ever did with your cell phone?
Throw it away whenever I'm angry? Haha

83. Last time you were sick?
Few weeks ago

84. What states have you lived in?
Selangor

85. Do you wish you could move?
Nope never

86. What is your dream car?
The volkswagen beetle! The classic one.

87. Have you ever wanted someone you cant have?
Nope

88. If you could be anywhere right now where would it be?
Rome!

89. Are you happy with your life?
Yes I am, minus the stressful parts.

90. What is one regret in your life?
Well I don't have any. Hahahaha since I did pretty much stupid things, but we humans make mistakes. So whatever.

Hiks

Have i told you that, one day, we went to pejabat agama islam if I'm not mistaken, to take borang kursus kahwin for Zafri's cousin and his fiancée. Then I waited in the car and blablabla. He came back from the office and then he gave me the papers. And i was like, "why there are two sets?" and he replied "oh ours?" and he made this face, he smiled and with his brightest eyes hahahaha my god. Comel nak pengsan. That was so nice of him to actually think about going to the kursus kahwin. But we're going to finish our studies first of course. Hahahahaha dah bye.

Braces survey hahahaha

1. What are you getting corrected with your braces? Example: underbite, overbite, teeth straightening, etc.

Teeth straightening

2. Please rate the scale of pain, if any, you had getting your braces put on.

Horrid pain!

3. When getting braces put on how long did you have to keep your mouth open. Please give a estimate of time.

Hahaha the heck.

4. How long did it hurt after getting your braces put on. Please provide a number of days below.

Like months? Duhh

5. Please rate the pain level for having your braces tightened?

Infinity luls
 

6. What food restrictions do you have? Please list all.

None. Well at first I can't eat anything other than porridge. So yah.

7. Did you ever break food restrictions.

 Yes

8. How many months did/do you have to wear your braces?

Almost 4 years.

9. Once your braces are removed will you have to have further orthodontic work?

 Yes.


10. How much did/will your braces cost?

Hahahahahaha sibuk je nak tau

Kellie's Castle

Been here! Went to tapah since brother has finished his current semester. So alang-alang dah sampai and plus the Kellie's Castle is somewhere there, why not kan? The entrance fee wasn't expensive, affordable so, give it a try! The castle was said to be haunted by Kellie whom died somewhere in Portugal if I'm not mistaken, and not in the house and the locals said, he's taking care of the house at night, I'm not sure whether it's true or not. The house was actually still under construction and it was left just the way it is. I went up till the rooftop of the castle so you basically can see everything around the castle from up there. But since it's not surrounded by the paddy field or what, you can only see trees. But pretty amazing. And it's quite a good view.

It was raining heavily all the way back to shah alam so the journey took quite some time. Plus the rain, accidents and cars. That's all then.

Thanks for reading!

Yes, you.

You're an actress
Pretend to be good
Telling everyone what I did wrong
Victimizing yourself

You know what he said?
"I was playing around
I was bored, she's nothing"
And even worse.
Have I told you that?
Nope, I did not.

It's my fault
Trying to fix what's broken
Because of you... And him
And now stop.
You've no idea
What I'm dealing with
What I've been through before
What I did and willing to do.

What have you done?
Even you know who I am
And what I am?
Now you're telling me,
What's right and wrong?
Do you need a doctor?

Don't go around
And telling shits about me
When you're the one who did wrong
You don't even know me
I did for a reason,
And you're the reason why.

Do me a favor,
Go away
And never come back
You're nothing
Not more than nothing.

Do it with class

New chapter. The end of the two shorties-unknown-crap story. *or three? Or more? Satu kampung kan. Hahahaha. Bye!

Stop right there

I'm not sure whether dragging your best friend into what you did wrong is so "matured" thing to do. I mean c'mon it's so high school. I was in the situation where "you mess with my bestfriend, you mess with me" kinda situation. No matter what he/she does, you'll always be on their sides even if it's wrong. It's not only a bestfriend, it's best friends, yes with the s. What I meant by its so high school because only high school students did that. Tak tau la kalau dulu masa sekolah lame nak mati ke apa perempuan ni kan so lambat sangat nak go through all the dramas, sampai degree baru nak merasa.

Like seriously, all the stalking stuff tu semua? Blurgh. I did all that la weh so I know better. Stalk orang sambil on the phone with best friends, stalk every conversation, every pictures, blogs, and even gaduh online ni semua dah pernah jadi, Each person each tab. Okay? So whatever. I've come to a point where I don't even care to drag everyone to care about my problem. So called grown up kan, so deal with it alone ah. Ni ajak satu kampung apa benda minah. The heck? Just go back to where you're belong to. Not here for sure.

A big LOL,

I'm still trying as hardest as I can to finish up my lab reports. So I'm taking a break after screwing all the infos I have and all the website pages I've searched. Haha. So recently people keep on asking me when am I about to get married. I know it seems inappropriate to go out like every day and the whole day of the everyday. But my dear, to get married you have to put your full commitment. Plus, I'm not gonna get married by using my parents' money. I mean how much do you think money that I have in my accounts? It's a good thing to be married at such young age. Not all have the chance that you have, and plus I put studies as my priorities and to get stable job and life is a must. I don't wanna get married with nothing. From what I've heard there's a good thing about getting married early and there's the bad things to. For some girls, complaining "laaa nak kena masak keee". It's not like you have to be the best cook to get married but tak nak ke bagi husband makan apa kita masak? Right? And bukan masak je, kalau bangun pagi pun matahari dah terpacak tu, ada hati nak kahwin ke? I'm such an old fashion when it comes to marriage things. I've my own opinion. That is why you have to prepare yourself before going into marriage life. Orang kata nanti boleh belajar, from what I've seen, perempuan yang tak pandai masak tu, sampai ke tua tak masak kat rumah. Memang la tak semua macam tu but most of them are. So shut the topic off. I'm gonna focus on my studies first and get a good job with good pays of course, get things my parents deserve, buy myself a car and a house. Then comes marriage. Studies and family always come first. But of course, we're going towards the way. It's not like we're going to stay in this kind of relationship forever. I'm happy to see that he's making efforts to actually move our relationship to the next level, and of course I want both of us to be succeed in whatever we're going after for. Till then, tunggu je la invitation card sampai.

Resistance

I'm still contemplating between buy whatever I want or go for what I need. Because I might not need whatever it is right now but soon enough I'll burden myself and people around me. But damn! The lens is incredibly sexy! It's so hard to resist! But no, save the money for other fun things to do I guess. So yah, sabar ye sabar. Lots of stuff to do. Two lab reports and assignments and test and blablabla. C'mon! It's a holiday. I'll pass for now :b

Oh yah, we are now finally 5 years old! Tehee! So planning on to do something adventurous, maybe. This weekend. Which people around me not yet done it. No, bukan bukit broga which too overrated. HAHA.

Kbye.

First time ever

For the first time ever! Tengok bola kat stadium. Hihihi. Thank you cik abe zafri for the experience! Hehe. I dont even know anything about the football thingy. We went out for the whole day and around 6++ pm he texted me and telling me to get ready and keluar after isya. Yada yada yada sampai stadium. And dah ready dengan ticket tah mana dia dapat tah. I'm not a fan of football, tengok la sometimes kat TV but tak ikut sangat. But bila tengok kat stadium, meriah dia lain macam. Seronok even tak pandai pasal bola. And congratulations Selangor! Haha kbye

Getting married? Luls

Thought of doing the tutorial but then "maybe a little break is okay" without even starting yet. So it's not a break, more to procrastination.

I realized that lots of people around me are now starting to talk about getting married. Well, I did. Sometimes I suddenly blurted out "nak kawin ah" in the middle of the class. But actually it's not something that supposed to be an issue. I mean, we're only 21-23 years old. Plus I really wanna get good grades and good job with good salary and buy myself a car and a house. My mom got married at 19 but that doesn't mean I have to get married as soon as possible. Like seriously, how come being single is an issue when all of your living is depending on your parents money. I really wanna earn money by my own, and of course having the grandest wedding reception is one of my dream. But kalau dah sampai jodoh tu lain cerita la. Tapi kalau belum sampai, jangan la duk melalak sedih tak kahwin lagi. It's not a big deal. Bukan macam zaman dulu umur 15 tak kahwin pun anak dara tua dah.

So my point is, bagus la cepat berkahwin but kalau takde jodoh lagi tu, relax je eh.

Dah nak sambung buat kerja. Bye.

Cameron Highland

Just got back from Cameron Highland! Sebenarnya pergi sebab ada wedding so it's not really a vacation. Since we've been there like more than 5 times so we skipped the tea whatever thing is. Only went for the strawberry and fruits hunting. Oh sayur and jagung and stuff. And sampai la Shah Alam. Home sweet home! Got class at 8.30 am tomorrow. So gonna hit the bed first and take a nap. Even though i slept all the way to shah alam. But gonna hang out with cik abe for awhile tonight hehe.

A short vacay!

Regretful

You know when one of the decision you've made and somehow you have this tiny little regret about the decision. Well, it's not tiny little regret ke apa tah, it's quite big ah sebenarnya. As you know I'm studying in uitm currently. But then, I will always wonder what would it be like if I had choose matriculation or UTP instead of uitm. Yes, I was offered a pure science program in Kolej Matrikulasi Selangor which is located in Banting and a one year foundation program of Civil engineering at UTP and also chemical engineering in uitm Penang. I don't really know why I chose uitm over the other two. Maybe because I don't really want to go to matriks. But then I am more into chemical than civil. But the thing is, maybe my life would be much more better in UTP. Maybe la kan. Because the campus is damn nice weh. I just went for the interview suka suka sebenarnya and didn't expect pun dapat tawaran, but bila dapat tu tak pilih tu rasa menyesal sangat sampai sekarang. Because it's UTP. UTP okay. Kalau boleh patah balik masa, memang la aku pergi for sure tak kira dapat any course pun. I have a friend there, yang masa tu kitorang memang pergi saja saja. But then she also got the offer from uitm. But sama course tau, so she chose UTP instead. Aku ni dilemma sebab course dapat semua lain lain. Haih. What to do. Hidup je la dengan decision aku dah buat. Maybe something better is waiting. Think positive je la kan.

One day trip to Malacca

16th of September, 2014.
"jom pergi PD"
"pantai PD tak cantik. Nak jalan jalan KL ke nak pergi melaka?"
"melaka jom".

And tadaaaaa! Zafri and I went for a one day trip to Melaka. It's not like those visiting places kind of trip. It's more to jalan jalan cari makan.
First we went to Jonker Walk. Sampai around 2 pm then pusing punya pusing kat Jonker Walk tu, tak jumpa kedai makan Melayu. So makan dulu onde-onde and minum kelapa bulat ke apa ke tah. Then we walked across the Jonker Walk to Menara Taming Sari, and finally we found the famous Asam Pedas Selera Kampung. Pukul 4 still full house. The foods are marvellous.

Next we went for coconut shake hunting in Klebang. Orang kata sedap sangat coconut shake dia so nak la rasa sedap sangat ke. Haha. Beratur panjang gila, pengsan oi. Sekali rasa... Okay la. Tak la sedap sangat kot sebab dah rasa yang lagi sedap. Hehehe sorry.

Dah habis coconut shake, we went to Park Putra Tandoori & Naan. We had naan cheese and tandoori chicken, sedap gila kalah hakim. Hahaha. Siapa yang pergi Melaka tu, try la, kena try! Puas hati. The journey tak habis lagiii. Seafood pulak malam tu, dekat Ikan Bakar Sungai Duyung. Ramai gila orang tapi service super fast. And aku yang tak makan udang pun, jadi makan udang. Zafri ordered butter garlic prawn, memang bau dia sedap gila tak tipu. Even orang belakang pun tanya udang tu masak apa. Hahaha. Overall puas hati. Senak gila perut. Balik je malam tu, rasa nak tidur je. Sampai rumah pengsan terus. Haha.

Siapa yang baca post ni konon konon nak sangat interesting place to eat ke visit tu ke ha ni ha aku post. Blablabla, bye.

Funny bunny

I wonder why certain people think they need the urge to complain about others. I mean like dude seriously? Plus, I've made this blog and its not mainly for you pun kan. Why bother to read pun anyway? It's not like no you have to read it, you must read every post. Funny isn't it? And then ta dah! Complain complain and complains. This blog is like my not so diary. Because me having the real diary? Have to write on it every page every day? Haha suka hati aku la. Kata pun, it's my life, none of your business. Lawak la korang ni. Kenapa lawak sangat ni? Ee geram pulak, nak cubit la sikit. Okay, yang sakit hati nya engkau orang. Yang suka nya aku. Hahaha dah dah bye bitchachos.

Official!

Hellooooo

A little bit update, officially own a matrix card. It was darn awkward because the one who took the picture was a guy, and he was like "okay senyum"  and me eheh yes senyum. And then, "kita gelap kan sikit ehh gambar ni" Because it was too bright ke apa i don't know and tadaaaaa yellow-ish skin color -_-" awesomeeeeeee.

Oh btw, already got my muet result. Hehehehe. It was okay. But then I got 2 points lesser than Zafri's. Then, he started on his speech "Tak British sangat la you ni speaking". Whatever and whatever. So most of my friends also achieved band 4. Congratulations everyone! Yeay! Let's partayyyy. At least we did remember apa Mr Liaw practiced during the whole debate thing in every class. It's good.

That's all then for now. So daa!

About me,

Hi!

So I've been tagged by a friend of mine about those 20 facts about me. And i didn't write the whole thing because it's gonna be damn long. Since I've nothing much to do right now *liar liar she's on fire*, saja nak buat kat blog. Because one of my fav things to do Masa zaman MySpace dulu la kan, was to post surveys on the bulletin side tu.

So here you go,

1. Well let's start with the basic one, my name is Siti Nur Aqila binti Razali. Almost everyone call me as Qila. Or I prefer Aqila to not-so-close group of people.

2. My birthdate is on 22nd of March, '93. Yes, 21 years old.

3. Live in Shah Alam. And am not planning to move out no matter what the reason is.

4. I'm into art and photography. But further my study in science stream.

5. I don't know how to make friends, and almost everyone thought that I am 'sombong'.

6. Try to take what's mine or interfere with my life, you'll get what you deserve.

7. I have this favourite bracelet, been wearing it for almost 4 years.

8. Bukan anak manja. Or my parents' fav daughter.

9. Spend my time outside more than at home. Since standard 4. Sebab tak rapat langsung dengan family so I prefer not to stay at home. *Konon konon independent *

10. Start pakai tudung since I was in form 5, alhamdulillah until now, before that on off.

11. I prefer wearing men's clothes rather than women's sebab besar and selesa gila nak mati and lagi cantik.

12. Suka sangat pergi holiday but parents suka pergi sorang sorang. So made a list to go, which akan pergi sendiri. Hehehe.

13. Don't bring me flowers, bring me good foods. *ini Zafri memang pandai gila bab bab bagi makan. Happy tummy*

14. Once I hate you, I'll hate you forever. And FYI, even your grammar mistakes pun or even you're breathing pun annoyed me enough. *even though I'm not good in English, but who cares if you're poorer than me*

15. I don't really watch TV, so no I don't know the latest news unless it appears on my twitter time line.

16. I'll wear what ever I wanna wear. But no, will never pakai tudung bunga atas kepala tu or flower crown tu kalau takde any event yang memerlukan. Which I hardly find one. And no peplum. And yes to kebaya!

17. Sangat selekeh bila pakai flip-flops dengan skinny or straight cut. Rasa macam rempit. Sorry not sorry.

18. I can wear both heels and flats or sneakers. But prefer sneakers and boots.

19. Takde favourite tudung, shawl ke bawal ke, aku pakai je ikut mana sempat. Even syria pun aku pakai.

20. Used to be involved in extreme activities. Tak extreme mana sangat. And planning on to be back on track. Tunggu.

Tadaaaaaa! Siap. Dah bye.

Almost there

Suppp yo! Hehe

Went to Penang few days ago, did all the clearance stuff. So yes, not so officially graduated since my graduation is in November, if I'm not mistaken. Half graduated. Half way more to go! And yes everyone is now updating about their journey to shah alam. So okay, welcome everyone! Will be staying at home, so byebye kolej. And gonna get my driving license really soon, because nak harap kan Zafri je drive susah jugak kan. I mean, aku yang susah nak keluar sorang. Hahahaha. Even after like err 5 years? Tak sampai rasanya. Tapi setia tau drive kan kita. Terima kasih daun keladi! Hihi.

So yeah, have a safe journey everyone. Good to see you guys after few months of holiday. Drive safely! Nanti aku sibuk sibuk kat kolej eh. Kalau rajin la kann. Hahahaha

Friends?

So yupp. I'm going to register for the next semester soon. Which hopefully to be in the same class with my friends. I always get anxious about this whole thing like getting know someone new or going through the phase like "Hey, my name is aqila". Nope, not me. I just hate new people. I mean not hate as in hate. You get what I mean? It's like hate that the whole phase where you have to handle new people, or what kind of person she/he is. They can be some kind of two faces or what ever they are. I used to be okay with having lots of friends in high school. Like I know the whole school and even those people from other schools, hanging out together after school or weekends. But yah as usual, we just can't trust anyone. Even the closest one can change to be someone totally different from what you thought they were. So I'm okay, and totally fine with those friends I have. I really mean it. Yes, I'm welcoming new friends, but it's going to take some time to be who I really am around new people. Even now I'm not really being myself around my friends. I tend to build walls between me and others just to make sure I'll never have to go through what ever I've been through before. It's just me, not that I think I'm way to good to be friends with anyone, it's me. The not really confident me.

Cheesy weesy

It's 1.55 am. Just got back from subang parade. Watched lucy, it's quite okay, not a good movie as in not as good as it seemed to be in the trailer. So yah. Whatevs.

You know that feeling of the love have been magnified. Which you suddenly become more not willing to lose anyone in your life and you start to being over sensitive. Every text, phone calls, conversations have become more meaningful, plus you keep on asking yourself "what would do without her/him". Yes, I'm in this very particular state. I used to be the sensitive person since I was a little kid. I cried every night with the thought of losing my parents one day. And not that I'm being heartless now, it just that I'm occupying myself with whatever thing is. We all do to deny our feelings. We tend to forget those things that scare us or hunt us and pretend to be the strongest person. But we all know that it just a matter of time till we fall. The thought of losing anyone in my life even those people I barely know, it's sad how short life is. How easy to lose anyone. I even late few minutes the moment my grandfather passed away and I regret every seconds I wasted. Just don't. We plan for the future, but we'll never know what future holds for us.

A night to remember,

Hello people!

Okay, I'm soooo tired. Went for an open house this afternoon. And now just got back from a dinner at Publika. Oh ohh highlight of the day, Zafri finally introduced me to his friends or vice versa. And thank you to Zafri's friend for the dinner treat *Haha whatever even tak baca pun* and congratulation for you guys engagement. Hehe. Ohh yes, his friends are much older from me of course and Zafri himself because these guys aren't those from high school or uitm, semua dah kerja so that's why I called them kawan kawan tua. Hahaha. So I was like the youngest person among them all. Yes, awkward like super duper awkward. But everything was okay I guess. Hahahaha hell no, as always, I'm being me, the horrible person on earth when it comes to this sesi suai kenal. But yes, siapa tak malu gila jumpa like 12 people at once? You tell me? Hahaha. It's more to like getting approval from his friends for being his girlfriend *even almost after 5 years*. Yes.

Still regret about everything. Haih

Thank you,

Organising

So I've been thinking on taking out all the clothes that I own, and reorganise my stuffs. I've been wearing the same outfit like I don't know since semester 1 of my diploma I guess. So before I go for my-degree-outfit-shopping, i guess this is what I should do. All the dresses, jeans, high waisted, cardigan, shirts, shoes, bags etc need to be mix and match again so that they all look just like new stuff. I really need to stop repeating wearing the same outfit in the same week. I'll be staying at home so running out of clothes is not really an excuse. The worst thing that, I own few clothes that I dont really confident to put them on.  Like the flat high cut boots. It makes my feet look even larger. And I'm the type of person that not willing to let go of my things even I don't use them for years. I'll find a place to keep my stuff so that I dont have to throw or sell them away. And my sister being the kindest person ever as usual, will always be the person who like to throw away my stuff. Such as my dresses, tops, and my jumpsuit which was given by my mother! So upsetting. Blugh. So yah, wish me luck.

Puhleasee

Friends know that I don't even care what others do as long as they don't mess with me. And as long as you keep your distance and don't you ever dare to cross the line. I have my limits. Don't go around telling shits about me. Stop victimizing yourself. You were the one who came into my life without being invited. And yes, i treated you as you deserved to be treated. Don't blame me. I never know your existence until you came. Do I look like i care that you're alive? Not at all. Until you destroyed everything I've built. Now I want you out of the picture. Pretty please.

Ugh why do I have to tell you all these?! Common sense la weh.

16th of August

Hi everyone!

Fuhh what a long day. Spent almost the whole day somewhere in Subang Jaya for cousin's wedding and thankfully everything went smoothly. She's now officially married, yeay! Congratulation, both of you!

So BPL is back. Am not a fan of football, so not gonna update about those stuffs. Thank god, zafri isn't into football, so i dont have to hear he talks about football or whatever any other guys do about football. Like for years, i never experienced those thingy where the girls complained about how they being ignored. So nope, I'm so happy then.

And thats it. I'm having massive headache. Gonna hit the bed like pretty soon.

Bye!

You-ai-tee-em

Hollaa!

Yupp, the results had been announced today. And thankfully, i was given a chance to further my study. Yeay! And congratulations everyone! Those who might not have the chance, dont give up. Something better might be waiting for you in the future. Everthing happens for a reason, remember? Allah knows what is the best for you.

Good luck everyone!

Eid '14

Hello everyone!

So hows your eid so far? Mine was pretty good. I was actually invited more to wedding event compared to open houses. Ramai kahwin eh tahun ni. Hehe. Nothing much to be enlightened. Few friends came to my house and yes my close friend from primary school came too! After like 9 years! Aahh such a long time! She's getting prettier and maintain slim gitu. Malu I tau tengok dia. Hehe. So i was like sooo unprepared, and zafri was like "orang tak pernah datang rumah, kelam kabut ha". And guess what, he sat at the corner and do nothing -_- thanks to little sister for helping me out. Dia lagi tau nak served all the foods. Hikhik. And thank you for coming guys! It was such a pleasure! Till we meet again, insyaAllah :)

Yes. YOU.

I think we should all take a class which teach us how to handle few types of people. First those with its-all-about-me attitude. Second, I'm-the-best and thirdly, I'm-always-right. Oh not to forget, 'kuat perasan' type of people. Orang tweet je acah-acah pasal dia, orang post blog pun kata cakap pasal dia. Whatevs people. Whatevs. Do i really like i care? Nope. Get a life. Stop stalking me. Sampai terfavourite bagai. Puhleaseee. Should have prepared myself before doing all this stuffs called living my own life. Hehh

D to the R to the E A M

Hello everyone

Everyone has their own dreams. Some people might wanna spend the rest of their life doing nothing, partying or anything. I always imagining myself travelling the world on my own. It must be so fascinating. You can enjoy every parts of nature. You can go wherever you want and do whatever you want. Most of people may focus on the shopping part or go to any fancy places. I don't prefer about going to somewhere like new york kind of place. I'd love to go to somewhere more green. Maybe places like west virginia, or the japanese gardens in san francisco, switzerland or france. Or maybe italy. And of course, my other dream is being rich. Lol. How am I gonna visit these places without having damn lots of money. And yes, lets work hard to achieve our dreams, my dreams or whatever you dreams are.

Toodles!

Blog content

Oh hello everyone

Like I said before, i owned two blogs before but decided to delete both of the blogs. I used to post my kind of personal stuffs and one of the reason to delete both blogs because I saw this post of mine which had been copied and pasted to other social network. So from that moment, i dont really post my personal stuffs as in cintan cintun post or whatever they called as 'a samad said stuffs'. So whatever thing that I wrote or write in the future its not gonna be based on my personal stuffs or life or whatever. Most of it may come from other people lives or experience *friends etc* or movies or series episodes. Kalau yang ala ala dear diary based on daily life tu ada la but not gonna tell in detail whats going on in my life. Just to be clear. Because i just realized that since my blog is open to public, so there's lots of people that going to be judgemental or busybody or whatever after read whatever things I've wrote. So I've decided to not expose my life to everyone since not everyone that do care and most of them are just curious. So no, dont judge my life based on my blog. Because i might be writing someone else's story on my blog without mentioning the real person. Of course, duhh.

Thank you.

UiTM Penang

Omg yes finally after the end of diploma, I'm here writing about my previous uni. Yupp, guess why and what makes me to? I was scrolling few pictures on instagram and there's a friend of mine posted the picture of UiTMPP. So I was like okay, and yah okay. Hahaha

Its not the place that I miss. Its the memories created there. How horror my life was since the first semester and how lucky I am to be placed in the same place as zafri. And I'm so thankful for having him there since i don't really have to find my own class etc. He did every single thing to 'take care' of me since my parents suruh dia before start diploma lagii. He did a good job. Hehe tak sangat pun sebenarnya. Hahaha.

And those awesome people I met and yah I'm a kind of person that not good in making friends. I aint talkative, i dont even know how to start a conversation, i dont know how to socialize with other people. But these people, are the greatest. Thank you for every single thing. Like seriously.

I still remember how i cried every single night during the orientation week and i called my parents, friends and zafri like every single minute during that week eventhough those 'kakak kakak pm' keep on "letak phone tu dikk". I was like kesah apa aku, lari sekali sambil on the phone. Sampai free call aku 40 hours habis, zafri punya 40 hours pun habis, free sms pun habis, internet pun habis quota. Every morning masa lepas subuh, aku menangis je kerja nya. My parents keep on saying "seminggu jeee. Sabar sikit. Nanti zafri datang dah, okay la" And thank god few friends from highschool were in the same uni, and i dont really make friends pun the whole week, so berkepit dengan my old friends even we're not in the same course so some of the activities were seperated for each courses. And yess I survived! Hehe.

Yes, being apart with family wasn't really a good thing but the experience, haha i dont know the right word to explain it but yah good. Only god knows how hard it is masa tu tak ada duit and zafri and i was like makan kat foodcourt every single day and lauk yang sama. Jimat macam macam. Sampai makcik foodcourt dah kenal siap bagi makanan free. Tak, bukan sebab kitorang takde duit nak bayar, sebab dia nak habiskan lauk dia. Tapi bila ada duit sikit tak ingat dunia. Since dia drive pergi penang, panjang lagi kaki aku berjalan. Hari hari makan luar, siap breakfast lagi lunch dinner bagai. Lepas class je keluar. Tak pandang food court pun. Hahaha. Movie jangan cakap la, sampai habis semua cerita dah tengok. We had to wait for another week for new movies. Teruk betul. Balik tu takyah cakap lah. Almost every week balik.

But after he finished his diploma, aku jadi orang bosan gila duduk bilik. Sebab dah biasa keluar every single day, roomates housemates memang tak nampak aku kat bilik. Bila zafri takde, aku golek sana, golek sini. Hahaha. Tapi, berjaya jugak balik sorang sorang, naik cab naik prebet, boleh berdikari okay. Hahaha. But at first tu awkward gila beli nasi bungkus, sebab biasa tak makan bungkus, lepas tu makan kat bilik lagi la rasa pelik, lepas tu makan nasi foodcourt everyday. Tak ada breakfast sebab most of my lovely friends tak bangun awal. Hahaha. So aku belajar sekali tak breakfast tapi lunch before tengah hari. Hahaha. Every week je hilang terus balik. Tak every week sangat la, kalau ada test ke apa, tak balik la. Tapi the point of the story that i can stand on my own. Eheh not really. My friends helped like a lot. Seriously. No kidding.

Thanks for reading!

My point of view

Maybe for some of you, relationship might not be a big deal. But for me, yes it is. Because you dont know what they have gone through to be where they are and what they've lost along the way to keep whatever they have between them. Its not fair how some people come in between the two of them and destroy every single thing which they've built within years. And yes, things happen for a reason, i know but still we cant put the blame on one side. "bertepuk sebelah tangan tak berbunyi" kan?

And to whoever you are, its so wrong to treat someone like they dont matter at all after years together. After all the shizz you put your partner through. And I'm sorry, no matter what, I'll not be on the side of outsiders. Its your fault to put high hopes on those people in relationships. And dont put the blame on others just because he/she ignores you after awhile chitchatting.

And its not that all, i found it very unacceptable for someone to judge those people like "geli amat" or whatever it is. Like whatever. Okay? Let them be, they dont even know you for you to judge their lovey dovey relationship. Nak renew relationship every year ke apa ke like its up to them. Dont screen snap their picture and post it online with whatever your stupid caption is. And not all but some of these people are in relationship. So why dont you make your own relationship a big deal? And while the others who actually post "why am i single?", the answer is in your head. Eheh.

Familayhh

Holla!

So yah, i was having a conversation with my mum and blablabla, so i was like, "ma family kita asal mana actually?". Then she said my late great grandfather was from melaka while great grandmother is perakian. Which sempadan perak and near to selangor. So my grandparents live in selangor which is because my grandmother is selangorian. Yupp thats how we ended to be in selangor.

While from father's side, my late grandfather was from Melaka, and late grandmother was selangorian, so my father have been staying in shah alam since I'm not so sure, but high school, i guess. Err from what he told me before, something like that.

So i guess, our family more to melaka and selangor side since both mama's and ayah's family are originally from melaka and selangor. I dont know, somethig like that. Like zafri said "patut mulut jahat, orang melaka". But actually I'm not. Durhh

And in the end, all of my father's relatives are now staying in shah alam or nearby. And mama's too. While grandparents from my mum's side live in Sabak Bernam and nope, my family aren't javanese. I've told Zafri like thousands times. Blurgh. But grandfather can speak in banjar and understand banjar very well eventho i have no idea at all.

So yah, we always end up to celebrate raya in shah alam since semua kat sini. Thats why i never actually stuck in traffic congestion during hari raya and spend hours in car.

Thats all. Toodles!

Keep walking

The ending of certain things is the start of something amazing. Heads up. And smile.

The beginning,

Hello!

Yupp, me and my new blog. I deleted previous blogs for the reason that I own too many social network accounts such as foursquare etc, so i deleted few of them. And suddenly this thought of having new blog just popped out in my head, and I was like yah, why not?!

I guess it's not too late to wish happy ramadhan to everyone eventhough we're leaving the holy month pretty soon. Yah, time flies too fast. But we still have plenty of time, so yah, do your best!

Bye!